By Matthew Paris
Worried about how those city hospitals, prisons and insane asylums are closing right and left in your city? Of course you are. It's terrifying to have such dangerous people on your streets. Zooks, you have to be crazy and wicked to stay even.
What's worse the buildings are all being turned into luxury co-ops. Now one has neighbors who legitimately rob and do crazy things while they run your government instead of the helpless old time apostles of ultimate mayhem and weekends.
Stop worrying about the real state developers right now if you can't do anything about anything else! Rod Shrapnell has turned these once dim places into vacation resorts where you can ave the almost real experience of going to prison, being locked up in a schizophrenic ward, even while your relatives watch you being publicly executed by lethal injection.
How does Rod Shrapnell do it? How does he make the needles
in your arm feel like death? How does he get celebrity actors
down on their luck to play the doctors, to perform seemingly real
surgical operations including amputations on the vacationers
without anesthetic? Why do the huge medieval keys to the wards
and the spectre of bloodless bodies being driven away in
stretchers, hauled into black vans look real?
Who is apparently screaming with pain in other rooms, ranting about paranoic conspiracies to the walls? Why do the venom-tipped handcuffs seem daunting? Does it matter? A happy and satisfying vacation is Rod Shrapnell's business. In Rod Shrapnell's world illusion has to be good.
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