ENG 101

Hand raised, a polite student,
the one with the Shakes-
pearen name—Rosencrantz,
Guildenstern, I can’t recall

without calling roll—
wants to know just how many
commas a thesis
must have. Statistically,

as many as it takes, I begin
when interrupted
by a baseball cap in back
asking point blank: Can

a golf ball kill somebody—
adding before I can speak—
without explosives?
Bursting into the classroom

late, hungover, out
of breath, the quintessential
young man carbuncular hopes
out loud that he’s not

missed anything important.
Of course not, I say.
On your syllabus, you’ll see
that’s not until Week 7.